Friday, April 8, 2011

No MOPS, just mopping

So little A-man is home due to kindergarten pre-screening at his school today. He's at the height of his glory with lots of LEGOs and lots of plans! A & M have a stack of Veggie Tales VHS tapes out for a marathon today. I-M is furious about not being able to stay home too, so A and I are planning some surprises. We'll make a treat to celebrate the 15th anniversary of when D and I started dating, which is tomorrow. We'll have to see whether we can pull off anything else. Definitely having pizza tonight.

I was talking to Dr. O' last night about the MOPS meeting today. If I were to go, I should pay the $44 dues. However, I don't enjoy MOPS. I was trying so hard to go and to enjoy myself, but I just didn't. I told him about how I'd show up on time, get M settled in the nursery, and go sit at my assigned table where I had nothing in common with the other moms. Just so not my tribe. I never felt so bored or so lonely. It was so isolating! The discussion stuff was just silly, and my options were to keep mum or totally out myself as THAT mom who goes overboard with the crunchiness and the homemaking. He was so sad to hear how hard MOPS was for me and agreed that it would be far better for me to spend the money elsewhere. Like a lot of things here, there's an established group that gets something out of the activities because they're involved and they're with their friends. Same situation with the kids' school activities for parents. I'm relieved to have heard from other moms that they have felt the same way, like the people at their table were a tight group of friends, and they felt like unwelcome extras. While I know that some of how I come across to other moms can be problematic, I know it's not all me!

I haven't been back since I met some more like-minded moms, and I can be myself with them. There are some wonderful mommas who are part of the attachment parenting groups that I enjoy who also go to MOPS. Those mommas are great, and I'm glad they get something out of MOPS, which shows that it does serve a purpose for a wide range of mothers. I know a lot of time and effort and planning and money go into the program, and I'm glad it helps a lot of moms. Personally, I can't justify the time or the cost when I've got a lot of other things I should be doing, like actual mopping.

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